Crime jokes
Why is Michael Jackson on the naughty list this year?
Because he sexually kids 😂
There once was a boy named Sammy who loved this girl beyond belief. Her name was Rayne, but she didn’t notice him and or talk to him, but one day she did and they ended up liking each other and getting married and living happily... wait, no, that’s not right.
Sammy actually snuck into Rayne’s house one day and kidnapped her and locked her in his basement and made her into a puppet so he could keep her forever and ever. The End.
Rape: The only crime where you have to tell the victim they couldn't do anything even if they could run or say something, then after, are told rapists stop them doing something about it.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- He robbed children of their innocence.
What did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
Freeze.
when is it normal to freeze before being raped?
when a policeman rapes you.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
Why did the woman feel ugly?
A. Nobody would even rape her.
Man: I'm here for the job interview.
Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.
Man: Just anywhere?
Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?
Man: Yeah, that's me.
(Shakes hands and sits back down)
Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?
Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.
Employer: I like you already, you're hired!
Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!
Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.
Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?
Employer: No.
Man: This... This is a photography job, right?
Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.
Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"
Q. How does a feminist stop a rapist?
A. By using her equal strength.
New skin unlocked: Blood splatter!
(Obtained by running over 69 children.)
Q. What do rapists fear more than rabies?
A. Rape babies.
Why did nobody believe the little girl who got raped?
She said a monster attacked her.
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Kid.""Kid who?""Kidnap you!"
What do Michael Jackson and ACN have in common? They both go in little kids.
Q: What happens to KID who NAPs near a stranger?
A: He gets KID-NAPPED (kidnapped).
It's not easy to make good pedophilia jokes, because it's a very touchy subject.