Crime jokes
Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.
Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.
Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.
Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.
Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.
Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.
Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.
Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)
Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.
Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.
Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.
Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.
Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.
So it is women who have more rights.
So shut up, feminists, please.
Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?
So he could be wanted.
Inmate 1: Why are you in prison?
Inmate 2: I killed 4 people and robbed someone, what about you?
Inmate 1: I blew up a school bus.
Inmate 2: OMG, you demon! Were they autistic?
Inmate 1: No, they were Fortnite kids.
Inmate 2 (who is Muslim): Halelouia, we have found the messiah!
I was at a supermarket in Barcelona and I noticed the alarm had gone off. There was a thief at the store; the tea bag section had been ransacked.
Luckily they found the thief, Pionel Pessi, with boxes of his favourite tea, Penaltea. Shame on you, Pessi!
According to Christianity, Jesus is the son of a GODFATHER.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bum.
Bum who?
Bum holding a pistol!
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
He wanted to be wanted! 😢😂
How do you stop a rape victim from speaking out?
Marry her.
"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
"Rape is funny until it's your little sister or daughter getting raped."
Your mom is so ugly that when she went to rob a bank, they had to turn the cameras off.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
Because he wanted to be wanted.
Why can't Michael Jackson play baseball?
He made a hit and run!
Guys, you know any best rape roleplay? (I'm a guy, btw.)
What is Armin Meiwes' ideal date? Dinner.
What do the Twin Towers and murder victims have in common?
Both were owned by their own kind.
Why do kids want to become cops?
They want to find the guy who touched them.
There's nothing I like more than seeing a politician in a nice suit.
An orange jumpsuit that is :)
Not everyone is perfect. Just take Charles Manson, for example.
Today I ate out my girlfriend... Jeffrey Dahmer style.