Comedy jokes

Q: Why are school shooting jokes funny?

A: Because they're intended for a young audience.

What's the difference between you and an egg?

An egg gets laid.

"A llahu Aks into a bar..."

And it blows up!

What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?

"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"

I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"

He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"

My teacher asked the class to stand up if you're dumb. No one did, so she said, "Come on, someone must be dumb," and pointed over to the left side of the classroom. Lil Jonny stands up. "Do you think you're dumb, Lil Jonny?" asked the teacher. "No, I just feel bad for you. You're the only one who stood up," replied Lil Jonny!

I would make a disabled joke.

But they never work.

Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.

I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.

I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!

Dark humor is like water.

Some people get it, others don't.

What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?

A ventriloquist.

I was going to tell you a joke about a pencil, but now it is pointless.

These jokes are a little too explosive, if you ask me.

Ok, so I have a joke for you, go look in the mirror and when you realize, come back to me and tell me.

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it leaves and never comes back...

What do you call a llama that was in 9/11? Osama Bin Llama.

What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?

He left him hanging.

Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.

Why can't an orphan live peacefully?

Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.