Color Jokes

An apple walked into the clinic.

The doctor asked what his favorite color was.

The apple said "red." :)

What is yellow?

What is a redneck's favorite color?

Blue.

My hair is blue, and I'm blue!

Roses are white, violets are white, everything is white. I’m racist.

soon

What’s red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?

A frog in a blender.

What is blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint.

Yo mama so fat, she can’t even fit on the rainbow.

What's yellow, slimy, and smells like bananas?

Monkey puke.

My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”

I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”

I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”

Some people call them glue sticks, but they're blue sticks.

Roses are red, Larry is bad.

I'VE GOT A GUN, get in the van!

Roses are blue, violets are blue.

What? Ohh, shit!!!!!! I hate having dyslexia!

Why is the sun red today?

The sun turned red today. Here's why. As an enormous Atlantic storm batters Ireland, a related phenomenon is turning heads further east over in the United Kingdom. ... Just like the way sunsets are sometimes red, excess particles in the atmosphere can change the color of the sun in the daytime.

Just to get things straight, I'm NOT, I repeat, NOT racist, but this joke goes out to all the people who talk about other people with darker skin than the other person.

Bully: Your skin is so black and ugly (for the 5th time).

Me: I'm so happy you love my skin color!

Bully: Ew, no I don't!

Me: Then why do you keep talking about it?