Child jokes
Why do eight-year-old girls wear panties with flowers on?
In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there.
Tell an orphan: if you got no parents, clap your hands.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He could not find home.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Memes
Why does an orphan go to a spelling bee?
So they can spell "home."
Why can orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find home.
Sometimes I have this incredible urge to grab a child from school and yell, "I'm you from the future!"
Why can't a Chinese kid play baseball?
They ate the bat!
When I become a parent, I’m gonna regurgitate my food to feed my children.
It’ll give me an excuse to make out with my daughter.
What do you call an orphan's family picture?
A selfie.
Why can orphans not play bingo?
Because they can't get a full house.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
"Uh daddy harder," the orphan said. Oh wait, he doesn’t have a daddy.
Child: Mom, someone told me you talk like an owl.
Teacher: Who?
Child: Oh, it is true, you do talk like an owl!
Why can’t orphans ride bikes?
Because they don’t have parent supervision.