Child jokes

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where the home is.

My uncle sayEd to me once, "You're my favorite child." And I said, "You mean Nece?" He said, "No, my favorite child."

What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?

"That is bull crap!"

What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?

VEGETABLE OIL!

When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.

It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.

What do pedophiles do when they wake up?

Turn on the child safety lock on the car.

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?

What might an aborted child want for Christmas?

..... a home that isn't a bin.

Why does an orphan play mum and dad?

'Cause they need self-love.

What's yellow and can't swim?

A bus full of toddlers.

What is an orphan’s favorite game? Adopt me.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple always gets picked.

A man has the power to grant anyone a wish they want.

A kid comes up and says, "I want to be like Batman!"

The man smiles and grants his wish. The child goes home and finds that he is now an orphan.

Ha, orphans are soooooo funny. I mean, they have many family stories. Oh wait...

I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were.

Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"

They didn't reply.

I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...

What is the difference between a normal kid and an orphan?

A normal kid has a family.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.