Child jokes

What does a baby and a grenade have in common?

They both make a noise when you throw them.

Orphan

If you think about it, then adoption is the last choice for getting a child, so those who are adopted were the last choice.

Driving through the woods today, I saw a boy with a bare behind.

What's an orphan's favorite movie? "Going Home."

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where the home is.

My uncle sayEd to me once, "You're my favorite child." And I said, "You mean Nece?" He said, "No, my favorite child."

What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?

"That is bull crap!"

What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.

Q: Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?

A: Because he got hit by a bus.

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

Both can't see their parents.

What did a man say to his boy?

You are my son.

When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.

It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.

What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.

Mum: Why are roses red?

Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.

Mum: I made you.

A cop pulls two Arabian men over, walks up to their window, and says, "We are looking for two child molesters!"

Now after a short pause, the two men look at each other, then back at the officer and say, "We'll do it!"

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

What might an aborted child want for Christmas?

..... a home that isn't a bin.

I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?