Celebrity jokes
What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? Little skin flutes.
What do you call a chubby Robert Pattinson? The Fatman.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an Aussie bloke in Bali?
Both are expert drunks, but the Aussie is 100 times better kept. Johnny Depp, in contrast, looks like a demented leader of a violent drug cartel.
Juice WRLD really died, then how is he posting videos today?
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?
What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.
You're so ugly that you make Caitlyn Jenner cry.
He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".
Kobe Bryant and 9/11 are two things I don't joke about because when I do, they tend to crash and burn.
If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribble.
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
I have MP3s on my computer that are older than Johnny Depp's new significant other.
What's the difference between Kanye West and an orphan?
Kanye West has parents.
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?
An orphan is more capable of speaking clearly.
Yo mama so ugly, she made One Direction go the other direction.
I want to make a joke about Kobe, but it won't land well.
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂