Celebrity

Celebrity jokes

Fan

What's the one thing that you don't have but celebrities do?

Lots of fans.

Cigarette

If you give Kobe Bryant a cigarette, he will be warm for a short time.

But he was set on fire in the helicopter crash, so now he's warm for the rest of his life.

Forehead

Your favorite artist must be Rihanna, the way your forehead shines bright like a diamond!

Knife

Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?

A: Because knives don't have barrels.

Memes

Time

One time Uma Thurman was Poison Ivy; she was weird in that, except for her punny jokes.

Fuel

Yo... Kobe, you're going down man. Did you forget the low grade fuel?

Basement

For Charlie D'Amelio fans, my basement is your home now. Leave a like if you agree with me.

Ice Cream

Michael J. Fox walks into an ice cream parlor.

The man behind the counter asks Michael, "Can I help you?"

Michael exclaims, "I would like an ice cream."

The man behind the counter asks, "What flavor?"

Michael says, "It doesn't matter what flavor, I'm gonna fucken drop it anyway."

Prince

Prince, don't die! Just don't! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaasse!

Drug

How much drugs did Charlie Sheen take?

Enough to kill two and a half men.

Man

What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?

Driving under the influencer.

Music

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

Hairline

Hairline

You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.

  • 0
  • Orphan

    An orphan finds a genie.

    Orphan: "My first wish is to be rich."

    Genie: "Of course."

    Orphan: "My second wish is to be famous."

    Genie: "Done."

    Orphan: "I wish my parents could come back!"

    Genie: "I told you I can't bring people back from the dead!"

    Wall

    What is the similarity between Pink Floyd and Donald Trump:

    The best thing they did was a wall.