Celebrity jokes

Why did Michael Jackson die?

Because I have a new phone number, and he does not know.

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

How much drugs did Charlie Sheen take?

Enough to kill two and a half men.

How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.

You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.

Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.

What does Michael Jackson like?

Teabags.

Why didn't Michael Jackson get away with messaging with kids? Because they were all juveniles.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein?

Only difference between Michael and Jeffrey is Epstein wasn't a smooth criminal, and Michael was.

Kurt Cobain said he wished he was gay.

That's why he married Courtney Love.

Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to fill her car with Vin Diesel.

I added Paul Walker on Xbox...

But he spends all his time on the dashboard.

MrBeast: *breathes*

Twitter: 😡🤬

Chuck Norris once ate ONE Lays potato chip.

What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?

Vin Diesel has family.

What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?

Driving under the influencer.

What would Bill Cosby be if he was white?

Innocent.

Damn boy, you must be Nick Cannon because you don’t know when or how to stop.

Your hairline goes so far back it looks like Will Smith slapped it.