Who did Michael Jackson want to be like? The man in the mirror.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.
What's the quickest way to get money besides winning the lottery?
Leaving your son with Michael Jackson.
Why didn't Michael Jackson date 25 year olds?
Because there were only 20 of them.
If Shaquille O’Neal had a boat, he would’ve named it Freethrow, because he will never sink it.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
What does Kobe now have in common with his helicopter?
They both have torn rotators.
Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony?
He wanted to clean out the blanket.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
What did The Rock say to his dad?
"I'm gonna Rock Bottom my cock down your throat!"
Today, I was at the Apple Store when I saw that a lot of phones were broken. When I looked around, I saw none other than Pristiano Penaldo smashing all the phones. He said he was mad because he ghosted vs a relegation team. Shame on you, Penaldo!
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
I cannot believe Kelly Clarkson's music is considered pop! More like comatose music!
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Both of their greatest hits are "the wall."
