What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to screw a lightbulb?
Tell Jacko that the bulb is a 6-year-old boy.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common? Firstly, they both went from black to white, and secondly, they both get turned on by kids.
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".
One thing that Johnny Depp and Michael Jackson love to do? Sniff on little white crack.
Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."
So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.
Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."
Amber Heard's Morning Routine
Wake Up. Eat Breakfast. Take a Shit. Get Out of Bed.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite dessert? Cream pie.
If you leave your small children inside a shower with Kelly Clarkson, you're a filthy parent.
Did you hear about Johnny Depp's shelter for abused women? It's going as well as Michael Jackson's children's hospital!
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?
An orphan has all their teeth intact.
Johnny Depp, Michael Jackson, and Marilyn Manson all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Why don't you take a seat, right over there?" Turns out the bartender was Chris Hansen himself.
Why did the Secret Service detain Johnny Depp at the White House?
Because he was about to kick the cabinet.
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
What does Michael Jackson like about 28 year olds? There's 20 of them!
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
Today, I spotted Johnny Depp on the clearance rack at Kmart. Kmart is currently trying to clear its inventory of wife-beaters.
What did Chris Brown say when he saw Rihanna?
"I'd hit that."
Chuck Norris decided to sell his urine as an energy drink, which you now know as Red Bull.
