Celebrity jokes

Olivia Rodrigo

What does Michael Jackson and maths have in common? They're both hard for kids.

What is harder than steel?

Michael Jackson on a playground.

Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five?

Logan Paul left him hanging.

Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.

Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.

Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."

Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.

So Paul Walker made a rap cover. It is called "Straight Out of Windshield."

Bippity Boppity Bill Cosby!

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he doesn't know if he is black or white.

What is long that Paul Walker can fit into his mouth? A long black tree.

What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.

What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?

Kids turn them on.

I do consider Johnny Depp to be a victim of domestic violence.

Just like how I consider a children's hospital run by Michael Jackson and a retirement home run by Harold Shipman to be both safe places to be in.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a carrier bag? One is plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is a carrier bag.

What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.

What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?

Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.

What's the difference between what Bill Cosby did and what OJ Simpson did? OJ Simpson's victims actually suffered and I actually feel bad for them (the boyfriend at least).

Why is Kanye West's haircut actually years of work by many doctors to piece together skull fragments like a jigsaw puzzle?

Because Kanye once interrupted Chuck Norris on the set of "Walker Texas Ranger."

Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.