Captain jokes

The pirate looked down the toilet, and what did he see?

The captain's log.

What do you call a guy with a big dick that likes to eat fish?

Long John Silvers or Captain D's.

Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers

You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"

Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."

What do you call a rapper who's also a pirate?

Captain Rhyme.

Captain America is a 106-year-old virgin.

What did Captain Picard say when he brought his sewing machine to the repairman? -- "Make it sew."

What kind of person will steal Captain Hook's hook?

Answer: A hooker.

It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.

If the captain of the Titanic was dumb, he would eat the iceberg.

My grandfather was there when the Titanic sank. He shouted 3 times that it was gonna sink until they finally kicked him out of the movie theater... haha

Why are Captain from SpongeBob and Michael Jackson so similar?

They both say, "Are you ready, kids?"

What did the ocean say to the pirate? Nothing, it just waved.

If Shaq had a boat, he would name it "Freethrow," because he would never sink it.

Imagine if hitting the iceberg wasn't an accident and it was all just the sailors' fault like this:

Sailor 1: Hey Ron. Sailor 2: Yeah? Sailor 1: You see that iceberg over there? Sailor 2: Yeah. Sailor 1: You know what would be pretty funny?