Navy jokes
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
What does Marine stand for?
My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment.
What did the Americans call the Battle of Midway after Pearl Harbor?
The Jap trap.
What's black, long and full of seamen?
A submarine.
Girls: OMG what color should I use, baby blue, light blue, or navy blue?
Boys: blue is blue.
I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
The US Navy Atlantic Fleet is closing in on the North American shores. Suddenly a blip on the radar appears and the radio starts crackling:
"Hello, please divert to 5° East to avoid collision. Thank you."
The commander starts answering:
"No, you divert 5° West to avoid collision. Over!"
"Sorry, sir, you are the one who should divert to 5° East! Over!"
"Listen to me, you asshole! We are the USS Washington, and we have an entire fleet at our disposal, and be sure we'll use all means necessary to keep ourselves safe!"
After a moment of silence, the radio crackled again:
"In case you still haven't figured out, we can't move BECAUSE THIS IS A LIGHTHOUSE!"
Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them?
So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
Yo mamma is so slutty, she uses a submarine as a dildo because it's long, hard, and filled with seamen.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is, then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.
My Japanese friend told me a Pearl Harbor joke. I told him he bombed it.
Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.
What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C."
Why is the Navy gay?
There all seamen.
As the Navy SEALs burst into Osama Bin Laden's room in his Pakistani compound, his last dying words forever rang in the ears of the SEALs...
"It was just a prank bro."
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
Putin be like that boat is now a submarine!