Captain jokes
Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers
What is long and hard and is full of seamen?
A submarine.
Spock went to the Enterprise's toilet and he knocked on it. "Kirk, are you in there?" Spock asked.
Kirk answered, "Hold on, I am making a captain's log."
The pirate looked down the toilet, and what did he see?
The captain's log.
Yo momma's titty milk taste like Captain Crunch.
Memes
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
"Captain, captain, there's a man lashed to the mainmast."
"That's your lookout."
Captain America is a 106-year-old virgin.
Luisa: The ship doesn't swerve, as it heard how big the iceberg is.
Captain of the Titanic: Wait, what did you say?
3 minutes later:
Why didn't I listen to the strong one?
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
kapteyn = captain
If the captain of the Titanic was dumb, he would eat the iceberg.
Putin be like that boat is now a submarine!
What do you call a fast boat?
Usain Boat.
What do you call a rapper who's also a pirate?
Captain Rhyme.
Your mom said my cum tastes like Captain Crunch, bitch.
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
What do you call a guy with a big dick that likes to eat fish?
Long John Silvers or Captain D's.
Even Captain Cook couldn't discover your forehead.
Even Captain Cook couldn't discover your eyebrows.