Call jokes
What do you call J Cow's new hit? Deja Moo!
What do you call a fish with no eye?
A one-eyed fish, you smart ass!
Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"
Orphan; "Stop calling here!"
Me: Hi Jaiden.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.
Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*
Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.
FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!
What do you call a train that carries glue?
A glue-glue train!
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?
A roTHOT.
When a bomb goes off, they call it an explosion.
When Keemstar exposes someone, they call it an exposion.
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
Superman has been called to a huge house fire.
Superman: "There you are ma'am, everyone out and all safe!"
Mother: "But my children are still inside! You need to go back an--"
Superman: "Ah fuck'em..."
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
What do you call a communist?
Braxton.
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
The Pope drives around in a glass box, or as I like to call him, a sniper's dream.
What do you call a nut with a hairy upper lip?
A mustach-io!
What do you call a group of Indians that eat curry all the time?
The Munch Bunch.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
Yo mama so fat, she called Dr. Seuss and he couldn’t even rhyme back.
What do you call an Indian? Indiana Jones.
What do you call a kid with cancer? Limited.
What do you call 2 wings and a halo?
A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪