Call jokes
What do you call the ghost of the Thanksgiving turkey? A Poultrygeist.
My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.
What do you call a stand-up comedian if the comedian doesn’t have legs?
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.
What do you call a lost Indian woman? Ms. Singh.
What do you call a pregnant slave? A two for one deal.
What do you call an emo kid with light up shoes?
A human chandelier.
Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."
What do you call something that eats kids?
An upset mother.
What do you call a banana that can dance?
CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS [sic]
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
TITANic
What do you call it when a gay guy farts?
An abortion.
"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.
That's what Elliot Rodger did.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want—he can’t hear you.
What do you call someone with no arms and no legs?
A nugget.
If it is called a forehead, what happened to the five-head, six-head, and seven-head?
An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.
Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.
When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?
A crookodile.