Call jokes
How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?
Call her on the phone.
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?
A baked potato.
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
What do you call a Jamaican proctologist?
Pokémon!
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?
An escapea.
What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?
An ingestigation.
What do you call a fat psychic?
A four-chin teller.
What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?
Names.
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.
What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?
The Devil's advocado.
What do you call it when a chameleon won't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction.
What do you call a person that inherits a lot of money?
A millionheir.
What do you call disabled people that follow politics?
A special interest group.
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin' Catholic.
Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?
Because there were too many knights.
Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book?
It's called "One More Thyme."
Why did they call off the leper hockey game?
There was a face-off in the corner.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.