What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?
One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.
What are cheetahs' favorite chips?
Cheetah Puffs!
Why did the emo kid get mad?
I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.
What brands do people in wheelchairs wear?
Michelin.
What happens when premenstrual Raggedy Ann gets with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.
What brand of paint did Michael Jackson use to paint Neverland Ranch?
Dutch Boy.
I saw someone who was about to jump off a bridge. They were wearing a Nike "JUST DO IT" shirt.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
Fila is a cool brand. I fill a cock in my ass.
A hand of Pepsi murdered a Coca Cola. An innocent Sprite yelled, "Quick! Call Dr. Pepper!"
Eventually, a 7-Up called Dr. Pepper. The Coca Cola was fine.
My uncle named his dogs Timex and Rolex. They're his watch dogs.
my son is such a miserable brat, I bought him a brand new trampoline for christmas and all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.
What cereal do I eat?
Captain Bolts.
He: I'm Nike, and you're McDonalds.
She: Why?
He: 'Cause I'm doing it, and you're loving it. :)
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
Did you eat Chef Boyardee's food?
No, why?
Boy are deez nuts so big.
Takis.
Dulux have created a new type of paint. It's called "Sue Grey." It covers up everything.
What is the most favorite coffee brand of feminists? Taster's Choice!
