Brand jokes
Dulux have created a new type of paint. It's called "Sue Grey." It covers up everything.
Takis.
He: I'm Nike, and you're McDonalds.
She: Why?
He: 'Cause I'm doing it, and you're loving it. :)
What cereal do I eat?
Captain Bolts.
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
What is the most favorite coffee brand of feminists? Taster's Choice!
Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.
What's the difference between a brand new Oldsmobile and a brand new Raping?
...Rape.
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
Freshman: Hey, what's better, Ford or Chevy?
Senior: I don't f**kin' care as long as it drives.
Freshman: So, I'm guessing it's Chevy?
McDonald's called back and they said they want their logo back.
You think you guys are funny, but look at your hairline. It be looking like the McDonald's symbol. 😂😂😂😂😭😭💀🤨🍆💦👶🏻😈😈😈😈😈😂😂😂😂😂😂👍😳😳😳😭😭😭😭😭😭🤨
Q: What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
A: Downey.
A man bought a brand new iPhone but returned it, why?
The apple was already bitten.
What is the cheetah's favorite candy? Cheetos.
What is the butt’s favorite computer?
The Tushiba.
How do you call an iPhone cover in Germany?
An apple bag. 😜