Brand jokes
Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.
What cereal do I eat?
Captain Bolts.
What is the cheetah's favorite candy? Cheetos.
Let's play pretend. I'll be Nike and you'll be McDonald's, cuz I'll be doin' it and you'll be lovin' it.
What are an orphan's favorite shoes?
White Vans.
Why did the emo kid get mad?
I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.
Redmi
Why is Megan a down?
Because her last name is Downy.
What is the most favorite coffee brand of feminists? Taster's Choice!
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
What is BK but gay?
Bgay.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
What is a cheetah's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 buckle some more.
5, 6 Nike kicks!
What kind of beer is an orphan's favorite?
Foster's!
Buccellati
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
Madden, because tissue, I weep Tears like rivers, cascading deep In this world, so full of strife I find solace in this fragile life.
Oh tissue, tender and so pure, Absorbing pain, a whispered cure. Each tear that falls, you gently hold, A conduit for the stories untold.
In the quiet moments, I confide In your embrace, I can't hide The weight of sorrow, the burden's strain You're there, a balm for every pain.
But madden, oh how you disrupt, In your chaos, emotions erupt. You twist and tangle, hearts collide, Leaving us lost, unable to decide.
Yet even in your tangled mess, You bring forth growth, a rare finesse, For in the madness, we find our way To stand tall, facing a brand-new day.
So madden, meet tissue, ever entwined, In this dance of emotions, our souls aligned. Through tears and anger, joy and fears, We find strength, as life perseveres.
Short and sweet, this tale of strife, Unraveling souls, seeking life. Madden, because tissue, we may be, But we'll rise above, forever free.
Freshman: Hey, what's better, Ford or Chevy?
Senior: I don't f**kin' care as long as it drives.
Freshman: So, I'm guessing it's Chevy?
My son is such a miserable brat, I bought him a brand new trampoline for Christmas and all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.