Body jokes
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
A penis has a sad life.
His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him up!
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
Memes
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.
Kyle's penis is small.
Friend: Why don't you cut your hair?
Me: Dunno, but I'll probably cut my wrists first.
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?
One day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy, then they heard a sound from the bushes. Instead of looking down, they both ran.
Two years later, they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial. They asked him if he has ever been caught. He said, "No, but a couple was walking as soon as I killed a girl. I jumped into a bush. They didn't know I was there, but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down, then he and his girlfriend ran."
One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh
Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?
Doctor: Yep.
Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.
Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.
Why'd the girl fall off the swing?
'Cause she had no arms.
Knock, knock!! Who's there?
Not the girl.
Yo mama so fat,
Donald Trump himself tried to use her as his border wall in 2016.
I have done a ton of work. A skele-ton.
Yo mama so ugly, she looks like a green bean with googly eyes.
Your leg is straighter than James Charles.