Body jokes

What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?

I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.

A penis has a sad life.

His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him up!

What do you call a flat-chested emo?

A cutting board.

Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."

Q: What do you say to a kid who threatens to beat you up?

A: We can always rearrange your liver 😏

They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.

Your butt is bigger than Uranus!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

Kyle's penis is small.

Friend: Why don't you cut your hair?

Me: Dunno, but I'll probably cut my wrists first.

Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.

Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?

One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!

Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.

I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh

Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?

Doctor: Yep.

Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.

Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.

Why'd the girl fall off the swing?

'Cause she had no arms.

Knock, knock!! Who's there?

Not the girl.

Yo mama so fat,

Donald Trump himself tried to use her as his border wall in 2016.

I have done a ton of work. A skele-ton.

Yo mama so ugly, she looks like a green bean with googly eyes.