Body jokes
My fucking balls hurt so god damn bad, oh my god!
What was the drug addict's favorite nursery rhyme?
I'm a little crack pot short and stout, put that crack pipe in my mouth, sell my body or sell my couch, get that lighter and smoke me out!
Q: What do you say to a kid who threatens to beat you up?
A: We can always rearrange your liver 😏
What do 3-year-old boys say after going to confession?
"My bum hurts!"
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
A penis has a sad life.
His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him up!
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.
Friend: Why don't you cut your hair?
Me: Dunno, but I'll probably cut my wrists first.
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?
My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:
I got it from her when I was born.
This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.
What gets hard when tugged and fits perfectly in between boobs... A seatbelt.
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
Gay dik.
Smol Dik.
Plastik Dik.
Rubeh Dik.
Smooth Dik.
Metahl Dik.
Did you hear about the guy who dipped his balls in glitter? Pretty nuts!
Worst joke Ever: What do you call a fat kom? A FAT MOM! LALALALLA!