Body jokes

Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"

Wanking.

A police officer said to a belly button, "You're under a-vest."

Sans: haha... Paps: what? Sans: i KNEW it was gonna rain today. Paps: that's nearly impossible, how? Sans: i could feel it in my bo- Paps: OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There was a dude. He had a mondo dong.

His wife was like, "Yo, where are your balls?"

The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies, "I knew those meatballs tasted weird!"

One day, Little Johnny needs to use the bathroom. His mom is in there, so he went in to use it and asked his mom, "What is that between your legs?"

His mom told him that is her bush. Then the next day the same thing happened, but with his dad. He asked his dad, "What is that between his legs?" He said, "My snake."

The same thing happened one more time, except with his grandmother. Little Johnny asked grandma what is on her chest. She said, "My headlights."

One night, Little Johnny caught his parents doing something naughty. Then he said, "Grandma, grandma, turn on your headlights! Daddy's snake is trying to get into mommy's bush!"

A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"

I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."

Bootylicious lol

My buddy and I both wanted to marry a woman who happened to be an amputee.

Sadly, my buddy won her heart, but I got her leg.

When you look exactly like your dead cousin and everybody thinks she faked her death.

FUCKING MENT

Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.

Why did the dick suck my ass? They died.

Your mom is so fat, it takes a year to turn around.

"Jizzy jazz all over my ass."

Clit

I like penis in my bum!

Why did the penis go fly?

Because a girl sucked it too hard, it went flying away.

You're so skinny you use floss to wipe your butt.

Yo forehead so big you look like Aeri.

You're so fat you can't see your penis when you piss.

A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"

Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?

It's between cheeks at the moment.