Body jokes
Sex is like math.
You add a bed.
Subtract the clothes.
Divide the legs.
And pray you don’t multiply.
For boys, life is a lot like a penis: simple, soft, straight, relaxed, and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard.😩😉😏
Q. What makes music on your hair?
A. A headband!
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
Why did my mouth say no to butt? Because that would be too much sex.
What do you call a dick with three eyes?
Preston.
Woah, nice cock.
If you are a girl--you are allowed to read this.
Look down your shirt and spell attic.
Why does Blake like lakes? Because of cake!
What can you hold in your left hand but not in your right?
Answer: Your right elbow.
Little Timmy said, "I had a body, eieio, now you are next!" as he shoots you.
What has a tail, a head, but no body?
A coin.
In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...
There was once a man from Peru. Who fell asleep in a canoe. While dreaming of Venus, He played with his penis, And awoke with a hand full of goo.
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.
If you are having sex and your feet are out of the tent, it doesn't count.
Shorts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin. When it's sniff, stick it in. It goes in dry and comes out wet, And the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag.
It's not what you think it is. It's a Lipton tea bag.
Get your mind together!
Yo mama is so hairy that she brushed it like her hair and put pins on it.
Daikon legs.
Jake grabbed Lina's thigh and said, "Why don't we have sex? I really wanna see your boobs. I bet they're hot." "Yeah, they are." She took her clothes off and he saw her body. "OMG GODDESS OF BOOBS, PUSSYS AND BUTT LETS HAVE SEX LOOK AT MY..." HE WOKE UP THEN CRIED AND KISSED HIS SISTER'S BUTT. SHE SMACKED HIM THEN HE TOOK HER TO HIS BASEMENT AND KILLED HER FROM SEX.