Body jokes
Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?
ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.
What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?
"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"
Can you see me?
Swallow cum, not gum.
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
"Don't worry, you can keep the tip."
Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.
Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.
Why is Uranus so big? Because you discovered it.
There was a dude. He had a mondo dong.
His wife was like, "Yo, where are your balls?"
The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies, "I knew those meatballs tasted weird!"
My brackets are so high on my teeth, they must be smoking something.
If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.
Yo mama so fat, she takes up all the space.
Q: How much does a skeleton weigh?
A: A skele-TON.
Anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus anus
Could it be ligma?
Ligma balls, daddy!
Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.
My wiener's small.
My dog got stuck in my ass, help!
Your mom is so fat she won't be in a coffin when she dies. She won't fit in it.
Really bad penis joke.