Body jokes
Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"
Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"
Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."
What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Realizing you only put in 4.
My dick is red.
Your pussy's pink.
It's really tight
When you're dead.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"
Wanking.
Cremation,
The last chance for a smoking hot body.
Little Timmy wanted to take a shower with his dad. His dad said, "Don't look down." Timmy looked down. Timmy said, "What's that?" Timmy's dad said, "That's Mr. Wiggles." Timmy wanted to take a shower with his mom. Timmy's mom said, "Don't look down." Timmy looked down. Timmy said, "What's that?" Timmy's mom said, "That's my garden." Timmy's mom said, "Don't look up." Timmy looked up. Timmy said, "What are those?" Timmy's mom said, "Those are her headlights." Timmy wanted to sleep with his parents. His parents said, "Don't look under the covers." Timmy looked under the covers. Timmy yelled, "MOMMY, MOMMY, MR. WIGGLES IS ATTACKING YOUR GARDEN! TURN ON YOUR HEADLIGHTS!"
Penis.
How do skeletons talk to each other? By the telebone.
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
What did the penis say to its pee?
"Urine."
Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms.
What did Sarah get for Christmas? I dunno, she hasn't opened it yet.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
My friends say they don’t like my skeleton puns.
I should put a little more backbone into them.
How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
Why did James fall off the swing?
He had no arms.
I wanted to get brain surgery.
I changed my mind.
Yo mama so hairy, you got carpet burn when you were born.
What's the hardest thing about being a rapist?
My dick.