What's the difference between a bird and a kid on the roof?
The bird can fly off the roof.
Yo momma so fat, she made up of a lot of atoms.
Why did the Mushroom get invited to so many parties?
He was a fungi!
I looked up how fast cum shoots and it said 28 mph. That means that ejaculation is illegal in school zones!
One day a cow ate a fish.
What came out the other side?
A dead fish.
How do you get rid of butterflies in your stomach?
Stop eating caterpillars.
What did the bird say to the other bird?
Nothing, because birds can't talk.
Where is an elephant’s penis?
On their feet, because if you get trampled on, you’re fucked.
Why did the octopus blush?
He saw the bottom of the ocean.
What type of bee makes milk?
A boobee.
What do classical musicians do when they die?
They decompose.
How do oysters call their friends?
On shell phones!
What is the strongest creature in the sea?
A mussel!
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
What do bats like to eat?
Bloodsuckers! 🩸🍭😂
Papyrus: HUMAN, WHY ARE YOU SAD?
Me: I'm just BONELY.
Sans: Good one kiddo.
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
What do you call a mushroom that makes music?
A decomposer.
The greatest bond you will ever have is the one with your conjoined twin.
Today my biology teacher asked me what's commonly found in a cell......... And apparently "black people" isn't the right answer.
