Mussel jokes
I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
What is the strongest creature in the sea?
A mussel!
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
Why did the bodybuilder go to the crustacean church?
Because it was a good source of mussel mass!
What happened to the woman who slipped in a seafood restaurant?
Um...I don't know what?
She slipped on a mussel!
What do turtles and lesbians have in common? They both choke on plastic.
I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
What do turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
Community talk
Im going to explain how it feels to be strangled to death First, you feel the pressure in your throat your eyes water and you start to taste something very very sour in your mouth then it's like someone lights a match right in the middle of your chest and that fire grows it fills your lungs, mussels, and your throat and all the way behind your eyes and finally that fire turns to ice like pins and needles of ice are sticking into your fingers, feet, arms, you see stars than darkness and the last thing you feel is cold