What do you call a mushroom that makes music?
A decomposer.
Biology Jokes
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
The greatest bond you will ever have is the one with your conjoined twin.
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
Why could dinosaurs not talk? Because they were dead.
Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
Why did the squirrel swim on his back?
To keep his nuts dry.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
Q. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
A. Because it has a silent pee.
If trees were sentient, they would make their furniture out of bone, flesh, and blood.
Now ain't that cool?
What do you call a bee that produces milk? Booby.
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
What did the egg say to the other egg?
Nothing, they can't talk.
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
Why are Amoebas so bad at math?
Because, when they need to multiply, they divide.
Just think, when we're getting fucked, we make our own food.
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
Why are camels known as ships of the desert?
Because they’re full of Arab semen.
What do orgasms and pulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
