Beverage jokes

Yo mama so stupid that she had an appointment with Dr. Pepper.

I like my woman how I like my wine, just under 2 years old.

Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.

Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.

There's like a weird after taste though.

Kinda like a sparkling water one.

I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.

I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.

I was at a milk store and ordered some milk.

They brought it over but spilled it on me.

I said that was a udder failure!

How do you call Doom guy that drinks Monster Zero? Boom guy!

What do you call an iPhone put into a smoothie maker?--An Apple smoothie.

Never drink tea in school... I give people tea if they've passed out... tea can be nice, but only have it once a day... It's not what you think... It's not tea, it's CPR.

How does a rapper like their coffee?

With a little bit of FLOW CREAMER.

What’s a German’s favorite drink? Orange Jews. Hundred percent concentrated.

The baby water bottle said to the mommy water bottle, "Mommy, I lost my teddy bear." The mommy water bottle said, "Why don't you RECAP on what you said?"

What do dogs drink? Pupsi.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?

He was lucky it was a soft drink!

Yo mama is so stupid, she thought that fruit punch was a boxer.

Why can't I drink tea??

Because I laugh too much. TEEEEEHEHEEE

Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.

What do you call a white person having a seizure?

A milkshake.

Anybody who doesn't like Pepsi is a Coke-sucker!

Yo mama is so dumb that she tried to climb Mountain Dew.

Yo mama so stupid, she went to Dr. Pepper for a check up.