Beverage jokes
How does Moses prepare his tea? -- Hebrews it.
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
Whenever I order coffee, I always get the depresso with extra depresso sauce.
People are like tequila glasses,
you gotta shoot them down fast.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
Yo mama is so dumb that she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
Yo Mama is so dumb, she stares at a juice carton for an eternity because it says "Concentrate" on the box.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
Two gay kids made their version of the Jack and Jill nursery rhyme.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pair of lattes.
Someone goes into a bar and asks for a blow job. The barman goes, "Me too." But then the guy goes, "I meant the drink."
A penguin walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So what will it be this time?" The penguin doesn't answer because it's a penguin.
Wanna hear a joke? You need some milk.
The Trump cocktail. Take a large glass and fill it with an ounce of everything behind the bar. Top it with whipped cream and a cherry. Now for the hard part: finding a Mexican to pay for it.
How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.
Drink tea with friend game night.
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug.
His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.
How much alcohol does JFK prefer to drink?
3 shots.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
What's a cannibal's favourite drink?
A Bloody Mary.
Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.
Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.
There's like a weird after taste though.
Kinda like a sparkling water one.
I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.