Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

They can never make it home

One time this kid came back from school and said “Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?” And his mom said "Good news please.’’ and the boy said “I got 100% on my math test today” and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said “Now to the bad news, I LIED”

Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

Why are cats bad storytellers? – Because they only have one tale.

Friends are like penguins.

If you stab a penguin, they die.

Today was a bad day, their was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy

A scare crow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field

What do u call a man who plays Fortnite 24/7 A: a virgin

What’s red and bad for your teeth? – A brick.

What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a badly dressed man on a unicycle?

Attire.

What’s brown and rather bad for your dental health? -A baseball bat

Bob and Brad loved baseball. When Brad was dying , Bob asked Brad to see if there was baseball in heaven. Brad died and two weeks later Bob woke up to Brad’s voice. Brad said I’ve got good news. They do have baseball in heaven. Bad news is that you’re up to bat next.

i hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though i think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldnt wanna hurt your funny bone, but i think your starting to get BONELY so ill stop pulling your leg. Now get out before i give you a bad time.

Once there were twins, Mark and Michael, Mark was the owner of a old boat. It so happened that Michael’s wife died the same day that Mark’s boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I’m sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible. "Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, “Heck no. In fact, I’m sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shrivelled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn’t very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!” The old lady fainted. 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

Jake Paul

Bad

Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon…

He’d always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!

Is it bad to hit an orphan?it’s not like they’ll tell there parents.

Apparently Monica Lewinsky didn’t vote for Hillary Clinton this election. She said the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.

Doctor: I have good news and I have worse news Patient: Well what’s the bad news Doctor: You have one day left to live Patient: What news could possibly be worse Doctor: I’ve been trying to contact you sense yesterday

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