Back jokes
Teacher: Here, have candy.
Kid: No, I’m too fat.
Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.
*Next week*
Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.
Kid: I’m too fat to get up.
Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?
Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.
A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog!
Man: *behind the women* She's so ugly!
Woman: My back is not a voicemail, unless you're a coward and can only say it behind my back to my face.
Hey, I haven't been on for like 2 months. I don't know who is still on here or like if everyone left, but yuh, I just decided to come back. Hey.
My dad went out with Nemo one day to the store. They still haven't come back.
"Creeper, aww man,"
"Today we back in the mine, got our pickaxe swinging from side to side, side, side to side."
Gwen, please just come back. I love you and I miss you so much!
Hey Gwen, next time you're online can you go to "son jokes".
I commented back to you and portory.
Awww, Gwen thinks she has a boyfriend! Oh wait, no you don't! She is just some loser ass bitch who could be a ho, you don't know. He was mine, and I want him back!
Jack and his kids went to the lake, and his mother wants him to go swimming. You know what he says? "Back where you came from!"
Your hairline goes so far back, your mom is scared you're not going to make friends.
What’s the difference between an orphan’s parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang came back.
My dad never came back with the milk. My mom told me he's in the army.
What's the different when a little boy drops in Japan then and now?
When a little boy falls today he gets back up. But then everyone fell and never came back up.
Why is the fat man roping himself to the side of a mountain?
So he doesn't roll back down!
Why are modern women trash?
Because back in the day, a woman knew her place.
20 years later
Johnny: Hey dad.
Dad: Yea?
Johnny: Fuck you, I ain't comin' back to your grave in 16 years, then ima come back, BITCH!
Dad: Doing the same thing I did to you and your mother, ay? I deserve it :( ;O not real...NOT A FUCKING ALL.
Johnny: Yea you kinda fucking do.
Dad:...
Having survived a severe injury in my past, I'm kind of glad paramedics didn't succeed in bringing the United Healthcare CEO back.
I was suffering so bad I got delirious and thought that the nurses were putting poison in my water cup.
That CEO was so hated that one of the nurses probably WOULD have slipped him something!
👌neck
So one time I was with my girlfriend, crazy, right? But we were doing a TikTok eye follow challenge, and she pulled up a pic of Gwen Stacy from Into the Spider-Verse, and I looked somewhere I shouldn’t have, and she smacked me, and I changed to the Rock, and you know where she looked? WTF, right in the no-no square, and since she was a girl, all I could do was sit back and watch.