Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a shit? I wanna know how it got the car started!
What time is it when you get home can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog 🐕 today is the night I can drive
Freshman: Hey, what's better, Ford or Chevy?
Senior: I don't f**kin' care as long as it drives.
Freshman: So, I'm guessing it's Chevy?
Today was the worst day ever. My ex got hit by a truck... On the plus side, my truck doesn't even have a dent.
What should we want?
Racecars.
When should we want them?
NEOWWWWWWWWWWWM!
What is your car you cannot drive? A super flying car!
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?
Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Maserati.
Maserati who?
Why don't you clean up this Maserati?
I went to a muffler party... it was exhausting!
What do you call a pretty person who loves Rolls? A roll model.
What plate do you need to eat in a car? A license plate!
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"
I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!
A professional golfer driving his Porsche picked up an Irish girl hitchhiker. He had his golfing gear on the back seat. The Irish girl picked up something and asked, "What are these?"
"Those are tees," he said. "I rest my balls on them when I drive."
"Wow!" said the girl. "What will those car makers think of next!"
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Why did the car fall asleep?
Because he was too tired.
Tiresome is the quantification of tire.
What do you call someone that is Mexican that has a BMW?
A big Mexican woman.
