Asked jokes

I had a new "blonde parts expert" woman call for parts. I needed 2 ought wire for a job. She calls NAPA auto and asks for twat wire. The parts guy was assuming she didn't know about Planned Parenthood? .. 😂🤣

Yo' mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.

I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"

My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.

Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"

Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.

I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.

I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.

A shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store.

He was asked to give an "eggsplanation."

I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.

Man, I love working in the orphanage.

Imagine this: You're at math class. The teacher asks you, "What's 11 * 11?" You say, "120." The teacher says, "Wrong!" You say, "How off was I?" The teacher says, "1."

Me rn: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHERES THE RAGE TABLE or something like that.

Orphan: Asks you random joke. What is the difference between my boomerang and my parents?

Me: The boomerang came back.

Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes.

She gave me a hug.

My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."

I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"

She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"

I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"

I asked a kid why he was so blue.

Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

Kid 2: No!

I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents are.

I love my job at the orphanage.