Asked jokes

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."

I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"

I asked an orphan where his parents were.

(God, I wish I knew)

One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

She asked me, "What are you doing?"

I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

She asked, "What does that mean?"

I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

When you ask your friend, "Can I hear a joke?"

"Sure."

"What do orphans and orange peels have the same?"

"What?"

"They both get thrown out."

I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.

Guy: Hi, how was your day today?

Woman: Good!

Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*

Guy: How many months pregnant are you?

Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.

I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.

I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"

She replied, "Two or three."

Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.

What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?

Dollar a pop!

Get it?

Yo' mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.

Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"

We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"

I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.

Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."

I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far, no one has given me a straight answer.

A snake walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "How?"

My dog is a genius... I asked him what is two minus two, he said nothing.

A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis. Her mom said, "You should have asked me last night. It was at the tip of my tongue."

So, I was walking around the outside of the building and I saw a kid and asked, "Where's your parents?" I love working at the orphanage.

I asked to switch seats on a plane because I was next to a crying baby.

Evidently that doesn't work if the baby is yours.