Asked jokes

Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?

Because they want to feel wanted.

Yo mama so dumb, she asked how much a free sample was.

My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."

Imagine this: You're at math class. The teacher asks you, "What's 11 * 11?" You say, "120." The teacher says, "Wrong!" You say, "How off was I?" The teacher says, "1."

Me rn: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHERES THE RAGE TABLE or something like that.

Orphan: Asks you random joke. What is the difference between my boomerang and my parents?

Me: The boomerang came back.

Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.

I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents are.

I love my job at the orphanage.

I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.

I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.

Man, I love working in the orphanage.

I asked a kid why he was so blue.

Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.

The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:

"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"

I don’t know if Jesus was black or white, but I know he for sure wasn’t Asian because people wouldn’t ask him to take the wheel.

I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.

I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"

She said, "She was a little tardy."

I asked her, "I thought they all were."

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

Kid 2: No!

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes.

She gave me a hug.

A panda walks into a restaurant, orders some food, and eats it. Once he was done, he shoots the waiter, then leaves.

Police and detectives arrive at the scene. They ask the waiter, "Who did this to you? What happened?"

The waiter replies, "A panda, eats, shoots, and leaves."

A shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store.

He was asked to give an "eggsplanation."

I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.

Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.

I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.

My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.