ANS jokes
What's an orphan family photo called?
Selfie.
Which falls faster, an apple or an emo kid?
The apple, because the emo kid is hanging.
A man sacrificed children who played Roblox, so when someone knocked on the door, they said, "An administrator has banned you from heaven!"
Sixty years ago, Stephen Hawking's teacher got fired for accidentally making an offensive joke. What was it? Go for your dreams, kids. Reach for the stars.
If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.
What is the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
Oh... one comes back.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.
I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!
What's the difference between an ISIS training center and a school?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
"I'm an orphan."
"I didn't ask."
I threw a lamp at an emo kid and told him to lighten the f*ck up.
What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?
Children scream when they melt.
Q: What do you call an Asian paralympian?
A: Lim Ping.
What is an emo's favorite place?
Niagara Falls.
Why does an orphan have an iPhone XR for their first phone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?
The slash and burn tactic.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family picture.
An American and an Asian walk into a bar. What are your names? the bartender asks. The American says, "William Matthews." The Asian says, "Same Ting."