Animal jokes
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.
What did the dog say to the other dog?
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
Memes
I searched up hornets and then said that it will leave a sting.
What do you call a giraffe without a bowtie? Neck-ed.
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!
What’s the cow's favorite place to go? The moovies!
Why did the chicken cross the plane to get to the other skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lloooooooooooooooooooool?
What do you call crabs that do not share their food?
They are shellfish! (ノ≧∀≦)ノ
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?
When it's not raining.
What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? (Dam!)
Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
This is how animals were named.
"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?
"Bison. Perfect."
A black cat will be racist next.
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.