Animal jokes
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
What's a cat's favorite instrument? Purr-cussion.
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
Magitat?
I’m new
What's meaner than a pit bull with AIDS?
The guy that gave it to him.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
A: Cowacat
B: Mooore
C: Cowacatfood
Bruh, frog cult is besttttt!
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.
What did the dog say to the cat? Ruff!
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Your mom is so hairy that King Kong got jealous of her.
Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?
A: I don't know.
What do you get when you put a vest on an alligator?
An investigator!
"Police control! Have you been drinking?"
"Go Pikachu! Thunder Clap!"
"Did you just throw a hamster at my head?"
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
What's a cheetah's fav food?
Fast food!
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
What do you call a legless cow?
Handicapped and stupid and monke and food.
What animal jumps the highest?
An emo kid, some of them are still up there.