Lieutenant jokes

Forrest Gump: Who's your favorite Lord of the Rings character?

Lieutenant Dan: Legaless.

*Loud explosion inside the tank*

"Where's the commander?" "He's gone." "Where has he gone?" "All over the place."

Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.

"Sanderson, fire a warning shot."

"Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher."

"Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger."

My dad has the heart of a soldier, and a restraining order from the soldier's family.

You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!

Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.