Animal jokes
A magician walks up to a girl and asks her to feel the rabbit in the magician's hat.
The magician asks the girl to rub the rabbit. The girl notices the rabbit sticks up and drools; the hat was covering the hips.
Meow meow, I'm a cow and I like cum cum cum.
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
A: Bison.
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
What's the difference between a piranha and a teenage girl?
The piranha doesn't wear makeup.
What's a rapper's favorite type of pet?
A rhyming parrot.
Why did the rapper go to the pet store?
To buy a dog for his bark tracks!
What do cheetahs like?
Sports!
What's a rapper's favorite animal?
RHYMENOCEROS!
Why did the rapper become a beekeeper?
To make some BUZZWORTHY TRACKS!
What's your mom and a dog got in common?
Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.
You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!
I met a talking lizard. The doctor told me he had ereptile dysfunction! 🦎
What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?
What do you call a chicken that was cared for? A tendered chicken.
Why don't bulls play archery? They might hit a bulls-eye.
I would tell you a cat pun, but it's too purr-fect to share.
What happens if you sit under a cow?
You get a pat on the head.