Animal jokes
Two cows were hiding.
One said: "Moooo."
The other one said: "Shut up! We're hiding!"
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
What do you call an Italian dog?
A labra-noodle.
What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?
A Corgi Potty.
Why do Indians marry cows? Because they bathe in milk.
Top ten dog breeds:
10. Dogs
9. Are
8. Beautiful
7. Animals
6. And
5. Judgement
3. Is
2. Cruel
1. Dachshund
Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: To get to the other side.
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
How do birds pay? With their bills!
What do you call a retarded cow?
Vegan (vegetable).
What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quack head!
My mom must be a duck then...
There were three cats. The first cat said, "Meow." The second cat said, "Meow." The third cat said, "Meow meow." Then the first cat said, "Don't change the subject!"
What is black, white, and red all over?
A dead zebra 🦓
What did the cow say to the sheep?
“Moo!”
What did the sheep say to the cow?
“That was a bad joke!”
So, about a year ago I was riding a horse, and out of nowhere the horse tried to flip me off it and I fell off. I would have been OK, but my foot got stuck in the stirrup. The horse dragged me along and didn't stop.
I would have died if it weren't for the Walmart manager who came out and unplugged the horse.
What do you call a fish with no legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Break!
I like tortles.
Chomp!
I named my horse Mayo. Mayo neighs.