Animal jokes
I was walking down Main Street when I saw a child.
I told him, "I will give you 20$ if you get my balls back from the vet."
He replied, "Why did they take your balls sir?"
"Beer plus going to the vet does not work well for everybody, especially when you're a furry."
When you are eating delicious street food in China and you ask the chef: You: "Is this chicken?" Chef: "No, its meow meow."
What do you call a fish that doesn't play basketball?
Why don't cows make good policemen?
Because they refuse to go on steak-outs!
What happened when the cheetah took too many baths?
He became spotless!!!
What's yellow, slimy, and smells like bananas?
Monkey puke.
If a baby cow finds a wolf pup, they will be best friends, but when mummy wolf comes, it’s a fight, so the baby cow and the wolf pup made it a secret, but one day the mummy cow and the mummy wolf found out, but no one got hurt. In fact, the mummy cow and the mummy wolf got to know each other, and baby cow and wolf pup were very happy and played all day long. Their friendship will never break.
-THE END-
This was not a joke but a meaning: if you are different, that doesn’t change who you are and your friends are, so be yourself and don’t let people break your dreams, and don’t forget them either. So no matter who you are, don’t let people change who you are. 🐺🐮
Moo!
Cow: I was just about to say that!
When the cow goes, "moo," and sheep say, "baaa," and the bull says, "boo!"
How do cows like to play games? Moobile (Mobile).
Cow jokes are udder-culous (ridiculous)!
Why did the cow cross the road? Because he was riding the chicken!
Wow, these cow jokes are moo-amazing!
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to his owner.
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
Would you rather:
Fight Mike Tyson
Or
Lick an elephant's butt after it took a crap with diarrhea?
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.
A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.
BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.
NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
Why can’t Chinese people play cricket?
Because they ate all the bats!
I would name my dog "Five Miles" so I could say I walk five miles every day, but today I ran over Five Miles.
How do you fix a broken gorilla?
With a monkey wrench.