Why do girls scratch their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have another pair of balls.
Best pick up line EVER.
There is an app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12 to 15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12 to 15 inches longer.
Are your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go way back?
Jack fucked Jill's pussy till it stopped functioning.
One day, Little Johnny walks in on his dad getting dressed and asked, "What is that, Daddy?" Dad said, "Oh, that's my snake." The next day, Little Johnny walks in on his mom getting dressed and asks, "What is that?" Mom says, "That's my bushes." The next day, Little Johnny can't sleep, so he goes into his parents' room and asks Dad, "Why is your snake going into Mom's bushes?"
Boobies!
Vagina?
"Candice balls fit up your nose."
Vaginas are like onions. They have lots of layers to get through.
Why didn't the octopus get a tent? Because it had tentacles.
A man ate a bee to mechanical sexting, but he was to be, uh, sex. Bee vagina penis, he want sex but [is] dumb.
Dammit, I hanged off their nose off.
What did the skeleton pull out from behind his ear?
Nothing. Skeletons don’t have ears.
Huh, I’m pregnant again. Must be something in the air.
Yeah, your legs.
When God had to take a shit from making a good wife, you pasted between his ass cheeks...
Vagina jokes aren’t funny, period.
What's a fetus' favorite gun? A micro SMG.
I’m sorry, Chairy, but I don’t need four more legs.
Yo head built like 2 parentheses.
When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."
A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."
