Alphabet jokes
This boy was in school one day when he became desperate to go to the bathroom. So he asked the teacher, “May I use the bathroom?”
The teacher replied, “No, not unless you say your alphabet.”
So the boy said, “a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z.”
When he finished, the teacher asked him, “Where’s the p?”
The boy replied, “Half way down my leg...”
Why is "dark" spelled with a K and not a C?
Because you can't see in the dark.
What do we find at the end of every rainbow?
The letter W.
Why are there 25 letters in the alphabet? Because the D is in U.
What begins with F and ends with CK?
Fuck, I mean fire truck.
Memes
What starts with F and ends with CK?
Firetruck.
What is a fish without i's?
Fsh.
I tell my therapist I’m scared of the 3rd, 9th, and 15th letter of the alphabet.
Doctor: Oh, I see.
Me: Ahhhh!!!!!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
A B C D E F G H I see a bitch in front of me.
W in Africa stands for water.
Why do orphans hate the letter FMD? Because F stands for "family," M stands for "mom," and D stands for "dad."
What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?
Dead ends.
Why is the letter "B" very cool? Because it's sitting in the AC.
A... B... Sea?
What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?
Why do elves go to school?
To learn the elf-abet.
o o a a.
There’s no "I" in "sex," but there’s a "U" in "cum."
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.