Alphabet jokes

What is a fish without i's?

Fsh.

What starts with F and ends with CK?

Firetruck.

Why do elves go to school?

To learn the elf-abet.

Know your ABCs! Assholes, bitches, and cocaine!

I was at the bar late last night when a waitress screamed, "Anyone know CPR?" I said, "Shit, I know all the letters of the alphabet." Everyone laughed, well, except for this one guy.

qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm!

Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?

Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?

Why did the orange stop?

Because it ran out of juice. Hahhaha.

If O2 is H2O, what is F?

It is H2O too; F is water as well.

Friend: Eric, spell mouse.

Eric: M O U S.

Friend: Yes - But what's on the end of it?

"There are 20 letters in the alphabet, correct?"

"No, it's 26."

"Oh, I forgot, you are a cutie."

"You're missing one more."

"I'll give you the D later."

"....come to my office at 1pm ASAP."

Q: What's a conspiracy theorist's favorite letter? A: Q.

Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).

Ii.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. Oh my gosh, I'm peeing on my shoe, no one knows about it yet!

Why did 6 eat 7? Because 7 ate 9.

abcdefgjiowqdou;rwohieugrhiosrvhionovruohwu.

If I had a dime for every time I heard someone say that F was the villain (Alphabet Lore), I would be rich.

I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"

I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.

Why are there 25 letters in the alphabet? Because the D is in U.