Literacy jokes
One day at school, Little Johnny and his friends were asked to do a sheet of paper which said, “Put a matching word from the word bank into the slot in the sentence that makes it make sense.” But when the teacher marked Little Johnny's papers, she asked why he put the word "bank" in every slot. And he says, “Well teacher, you said to put a word from the word bank and that's one word! So I had no choice but to put down that word!”
Why were Helen Keller's hands crippled?
From reading stop signs at fifty miles per hour.
The only letters in the alphabet that you know are "KFC."
Did you hear about the dyslexic wanna-be bank robber? He walked in and yelled, "HANDS UP, THIS IS A MOTHER STICKING F##K UP!" The lucky idiot got away because nobody could stop laughing!
How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?
Why is America the fastest readers?
They went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Why do leftists strive for a literate population?
So people can understand their wall of text memes.
Yesterday, a 5-year-old dyslexic boy almost saved his mother from drowning, but he kept dialing 119...
I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"
I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.
I read to deaf kids in my spare time.
What is black and white and red all over?
Answer: A newspaper.
That is what my 3-year-old told me.
Why do orphans not know how to spell?
Because no one likes them, dumb people. 🤭🤡
When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?
When it fails to turn up.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
My middle name is Brian. I was so proud of being able to spell my full name till someone pointed out "Johnny Brain Walker" was incorrect.
Why did so many people die in the Grenfell Fire Disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
What's only book rapeboat ever read? Rhyming dictionary, he got no rhymes without it.
370HSSV 0773H wait, you're reading it upside down.
What does a kid who has autism and reading have in common?
Absolutely nothing.
I'm George Washington. I can't spell "teeth" or "American."
