Age jokes
When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.
When I was in middle school, I was on my bus and people were doin' hairline jokes, and I heard this guy say, "Your hairline goes back to... uhhhhhh... 2042?"
Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?
What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.
Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.
Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?
Because it was over 10 years old.
Memes
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
I like my girls like I like my wine.
12 years old and locked in my basement.
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
Acne waits until you're 13 to come on your face.
What's funny about dead baby jokes? - They never get old.
What’s the best part about banging twenty-eight year olds? There are twenty of them.
Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."
Nurse: *Laughs*
Kid: "Why are you laughing?"
Nurse: "When I get OLDER."
Proceeds to laugh.
So, I text my girlfriend and told her I wanted to get inside her. Can you believe she replied: "Not again brother, I'm only 8."
When your grandma says she's rusty but still manages to teach you.
Your forehead goes back to when Burger King was Burger Prince.
Are your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go way back?
if priests were on Twitter, they would tweet, "He's a 10 but he's 10."