Age

Age jokes

Donald Trump

How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?

He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!

Girlfriend

Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."

Michael Jackson

In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the 'Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last.

Girlfriend

How do you know when your girlfriend is too young?

You have to make airplane noises to get her to open her mouth.

Sorry.

Stuff

The Good Old Days.

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

Woman

I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.

Burger

Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger?

It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.

Girlfriend

German

I hooked up with my German girlfriend. It was really distracting when she kept saying her age.

Hairline

When I was in middle school, I was on my bus and people were doin' hairline jokes, and I heard this guy say, "Your hairline goes back to... uhhhhhh... 2042?"

Parent

Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.