Aed jokes
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”
I guess you could say, “harassment something.”
"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."
It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient.
He was a great vet.
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both love naughty souls.
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Saying a Kobe joke after he died tends to ignite a fire in the people you say it to.
Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.
Your mamma is so fat that she has a gravitational pull.
Isn't a gaming console something people use to not be alone?
THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE 50% OF THE GAMES OFFLINE?!??!?!
I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.
A small boy went up to a dog fountain? The more you. HAHA gorgeous ddollars of benjamin frnakus wghen hes wearing beakini bea at the beach hahaha.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An im-pasta.
You know what's the most awkward situation in the world? A rapper with erectile dysfunction.
I don't understand why the Twin Towers were super upset.
Their pizza just got there a lot faster by plane.
Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."
Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"