Aed jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
What do you call a war dodo named Bob in WW2 and he came from Mars?
Bruno Mars.
It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"
Today, my family visited Disneyland. When we got to the hall of fame, I was shocked to find a statue of the BielefeldMan.
The tour guide said, "That’s Lewandisney. He owns the biggest collection of Disney TAP-INS and is a Mickey Mouse clubhouse member." Well done Lewandisney!
Want to know the difference between an orphan and a flower??
Flowers get picked.
(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!
She needs a flat surface cleaner.
God, those orphans were putting up such a fight, I had to lock 'em in the basement.
A plane is about to crash into the ocean, and the passengers are freaking out.
A woman stands up, takes off her clothes, and says, "Before I go, is there a man man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, takes off his shirt, and says, "Here, iron this!"
The parentless child stood as her orphanage was blown up by a kamikaze I had rented.
So, little Johnny is walking down the street and asks a stranger, "Sir, what are hormones?"
Then the man replies, "The moans of a fucking whore!"
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
Vape company: Hey, want some lung cancer and a nicotine addiction?
Teens: NO WAY!
Vape company: But it’s mango flavored!
Teens: O OK. 😤
What do a gynecologist and deaf people have in common? They both read lips.
Yo mama is so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I call him a hypocrite and unplug his life support. 😄😆🔥👍
Me: Sorry I couldn’t make it to school yesterday, I had an appointment.
Teacher: What kind of appointment?
Me: I had an appointment with a cut day. 😈😈😈
True story.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Because walls.
A kid goes into a restaurant without parents, and a waitress came up and said, "You have to leave; this is a family restaurant."
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
TITANic